Posts Tagged ‘depression’


Seven Fashionable Ways to Feel Positive (Without Dropping a Dress Size)

positive shopping pic

I’ve never met a woman who isn’t an energetic shopper.

Even when she doesn’t actively enjoy shopping, the modern woman still tackles it with energy and purpose.

Five minutes to closing?

Not a problem. I have my list and I’m prepared to run.

More women in the store than corn stalks in Kansas?

Bring it on. Yoga has made me limber and my discount radar is on high alert.

And yet few of us tackle our daily mindset with equal confidence or determination.

“Bad days,” many of us seem to believe, are unavoidable.

Feeling negative about ourselves and our choices is viewed as part of the pressure of modern life.

But aren’t the good days about as subjective as the shop assistant who smells a sale in the air?

Is negative thinking really as unavoidable as death and (sales) taxes?

The Great Depression

I remember being told once that negativity is natural. Supposedly the ability to focus on what might go wrong is a means to help us with danger.

From a historical perspective, when we were lingering in the mouth of the cave, wondering if its a good time to go out for a pee, thinking negative thoughts about
lurking predators, mislaid wooden clubs and the potential for frostbite on our exposed parts probably saved the human race.

But what about negativity now?

Negative thinking is obviously no longer necessary for our survival.

And yet, studies in the United Kingdom suggest that one out of three women between the ages of 18 and 23 have significant symptoms of depression.

Ranked as the number one mental illness in the world by the World Health Organization, depression affects twice as many women as men.

And while we all think negative thoughts from time to time, more of us are finding it difficult to move past such thinking, repeating our feelings of failure and
worthlessness over and over.

So why are so many young women caught in a negative cycle?

Research findings suggest that it is due to a trio of terrible traits: low self-esteem, a tendency towards pessimism and poor resilience to life’s challenges.

Failed romances, family disharmony, poor support structures and little sign of achievement or success at work are all triggers for negative thinking.

Sound like your life – and that of every women you know?

Then how do we get out of a depressive rut that so many of us seem to have fallen into?

The Bright Side of Life

There are no quick fixes for depression and medical experts will counsel strongly against remedies that promise simple solutions.

But intervention is viewed as a realistic way to aid those suffering from depression.

Helping people recognize that they are thinking negatively is one of the first steps, complemented by a focus on understanding that negativity is a habit that they can change.

In fact, feeling positive, mental health experts tell us, is not a characteristic, but a skill we can develop and train.

The reality is that many of us only feel positive when things are going our way.

Reaching our goal weight, making a new friend or getting a raise creates a natural feeling of well-being.

But what is far more valuable is the ability to feel positive even if the sale turns out to be stock not worthy of a reject bin or the new acquaintance reveals herself to be only a fair-weather friend.

Positive Outfit Inspiration

As many people mistakenly arrive at this site expecting to find suggestions for the perfect first-date dress or the killer outfit that will ensure they ace an interview, it is appropriate that the positive thinking strategies reflect a fashionable flavour.

So here are seven fashionable ways to feel positive:

1. Put on Your Glad Rags

Before you leave the house, actively “put on” your positive mindset. Treat it as a part of your morning routine, as essential as your wake-up coffee or a matching pair of shoes.

The first time negativity threatens – you miss your bus or the photocopier goes on strike – activate your positive mindset.

Another bus is on its way. You can use the photocopier on the next floor.

It should become as much of a reflex as putting up your umbrella when it starts to rain.

2. Ignore the 50% off Sale

You don’t need a paper shredder, just because it is half price. You don’t have to have the new “it” bag simply because it tells you so in a magazine.

These statements are blindingly obvious, but we don’t always apply the same sense of perspective to the events in our life.

Someone or something telling you that you are not smart enough, rich enough, beautiful enough or thin enough?

Put your chin in the air and walk right on by.

3. Get a Multi-dimensional Mirror

Negative thinking can be a difficult spiral to escape from, blinkering you from the good things in life. Change your perspective by looking at your world from a different perspective.

An uninspiring job staring you in the face?

Then check out the rear view – Do you come home to a bustling, happy home life?

If you simply cannot bear to look over your shoulder, ask a friend for their view of your world and get some objective feedback to help you see things more clearly.

4. Change the Label

Just because someone tells you they are authentic pair of Jimmy Choos, doesn’t make it so.

Similarly, if you label your current project a failure or your emotionally undeveloped partner tells you you are no fun anymore, this is only one interpretation of reality.

Tell yourself that you are beautiful, that your business is going to be a success, that your relationship is supportive…

Even if you have to work hard to make the label stick, you will have a far better chance of success if you approach the job with a positive mindset.

5. Clean Out your Closet

We often surround ourselves with both the physical and mental evidence of our “failures”.

Keeping old love letters, bad performance reviews or unpleasant text messages rarely spurs us to greater things, but more often roots us in the unhappy past.

Recognise that reading something twice won’t change its content. Instead, bin those negative reminders and schedule regular reviews of what you have to be grateful for.

6. Forget What you are Wearing

Have you ever stressed over an outfit for a big event, worrying over every little detail, only to forget completely about what you are wearing the moment you arrive?

We are most likely to achieve happiness when it is completely off the agenda – when we flow in the moment…

That flow – and the happiness that comes with it – often occurs when we move the focus from the internal (I’m not thin enough) to the external (I’m having so much fun with my friends.)

Perhaps you can’t change your dress size or finish the degree you’ve been working at for years, but you can change your mindset immediately.

Your memories of today will be all the better for it.

7. Ignore the Style Police

A sense of well-being depends on not just the the ability to impress others, but on impressing ourselves.

If someone has judged you harshly and found you wanting, take responsibility for counter-balancing their criticism with some positive thinking.

And remember that one of the most effective ways of feeling good about yourself is by sticking to and reaching your goals, so take a moment to work out what you would most like to achieve, then plot a positive, realistic course towards success.