I’ve never met a woman who isn’t an energetic shopper.

Even when she doesn’t actively enjoy shopping, the modern woman still tackles it with energy and purpose.

Five minutes to closing?

Not a problem. I have my list and I’m prepared to run.

More women in the store than corn stalks in Kansas?

Bring it on. Yoga has made me limber and my discount radar is on high alert.

And yet few of us tackle our daily mindset with equal confidence or determination.

“Bad days,” many of us seem to believe, are unavoidable.

Feeling negative about ourselves and our choices is viewed as part of the pressure of modern life.

But aren’t the good days about as subjective as the shop assistant who smells a sale in the air?

Is negative thinking really as unavoidable as death and (sales) taxes?

The Great Depression

I remember being told once that negativity is natural. Supposedly the ability to focus on what might go wrong is a means to help us with danger.

From a historical perspective, when we were lingering in the mouth of the cave, wondering if its a good time to go out for a pee, thinking negative thoughts about
lurking predators, mislaid wooden clubs and the potential for frostbite on our exposed parts probably saved the human race.

But what about negativity now?

Negative thinking is obviously no longer necessary for our survival.

And yet, studies in the United Kingdom suggest that one out of three women between the ages of 18 and 23 have significant symptoms of depression.

Ranked as the number one mental illness in the world by the World Health Organization, depression affects twice as many women as men.

And while we all think negative thoughts from time to time, more of us are finding it difficult to move past such thinking, repeating our feelings of failure and
worthlessness over and over.

So why are so many young women caught in a negative cycle?

Research findings suggest that it is due to a trio of terrible traits: low self-esteem, a tendency towards pessimism and poor resilience to life’s challenges.

Failed romances, family disharmony, poor support structures and little sign of achievement or success at work are all triggers for negative thinking.

Sound like your life - and that of every women you know?

Then how do we get out of a depressive rut that so many of us seem to have fallen into?

The Bright Side of Life

There are no quick fixes for depression and medical experts will counsel strongly against remedies that promise simple solutions.

But intervention is viewed as a realistic way to aid those suffering from depression.

Helping people recognize that they are thinking negatively is one of the first steps, complemented by a focus on understanding that negativity is a habit that they can change.

In fact, feeling positive, mental health experts tell us, is not a characteristic, but a skill we can develop and train.

The reality is that many of us only feel positive when things are going our way.

Reaching our goal weight, making a new friend or getting a raise creates a natural feeling of well-being.

But what is far more valuable is the ability to feel positive even if the sale turns out to be stock not worthy of a reject bin or the new acquaintance reveals herself to be only a fair-weather friend.

Positive Outfit Inspiration

As many people mistakenly arrive at this site expecting to find suggestions for the perfect first-date dress or the killer outfit that will ensure they ace an interview, it is appropriate that the positive thinking strategies reflect a fashionable flavour.

So here are seven fashionable ways to feel positive:

1. Put on Your Glad Rags

Before you leave the house, actively “put on” your positive mindset. Treat it as a part of your morning routine, as essential as your wake-up coffee or a matching pair of shoes.

The first time negativity threatens - you miss your bus or the photocopier goes on strike - activate your positive mindset.

Another bus is on its way. You can use the photocopier on the next floor.

It should become as much of a reflex as putting up your umbrella when it starts to rain.

2. Ignore the 50% off Sale

You don’t need a paper shredder, just because it is half price. You don’t have to have the new “it” bag simply because it tells you so in a magazine.

These statements are blindingly obvious, but we don’t always apply the same sense of perspective to the events in our life.

Someone or something telling you that you are not smart enough, rich enough, beautiful enough or thin enough?

Put your chin in the air and walk right on by.

3. Get a Multi-dimensional Mirror

Negative thinking can be a difficult spiral to escape from, blinkering you from the good things in life. Change your perspective by looking at your world from a different perspective.

An uninspiring job staring you in the face?

Then check out the rear view - Do you come home to a bustling, happy home life?

If you simply cannot bear to look over your shoulder, ask a friend for their view of your world and get some objective feedback to help you see things more clearly.

4. Change the Label

Just because someone tells you they are authentic pair of Jimmy Choos, doesn’t make it so.

Similarly, if you label your current project a failure or your emotionally undeveloped partner tells you you are no fun anymore, this is only one interpretation of reality.

Tell yourself that you are beautiful, that your business is going to be a success, that your relationship is supportive…

Even if you have to work hard to make the label stick, you will have a far better chance of success if you approach the job with a positive mindset.

5. Clean Out your Closet

We often surround ourselves with both the physical and mental evidence of our “failures”.

Keeping old love letters, bad performance reviews or unpleasant text messages rarely spurs us to greater things, but more often roots us in the unhappy past.

Recognise that reading something twice won’t change its content. Instead, bin those negative reminders and schedule regular reviews of what you have to be grateful for.

6. Forget What you are Wearing

Have you ever stressed over an outfit for a big event, worrying over every little detail, only to forget completely about what you are wearing the moment you arrive?

We are most likely to achieve happiness when it is completely off the agenda – when we flow in the moment…

That flow – and the happiness that comes with it – often occurs when we move the focus from the internal (I’m not thin enough) to the external (I’m having so much fun with my friends.)

Perhaps you can’t change your dress size or finish the degree you’ve been working at for years, but you can change your mindset immediately.

Your memories of today will be all the better for it.

7. Ignore the Style Police

A sense of well-being depends on not just the the ability to impress others, but on impressing ourselves.

If someone has judged you harshly and found you wanting, take responsibility for counter-balancing their criticism with some positive thinking.

And remember that one of the most effective ways of feeling good about yourself is by sticking to and reaching your goals, so take a moment to work out what you would most like to achieve, then plot a positive, realistic course towards success.

Some years ago I took a job as a cook for an important British family who were spending the summer at their country estate.

I worked at least twelve hours a day and was homesick for Australia, where people didn’t insist upon a home-cooked flan at every meal or line the servants up to educate them on antique sideboards and the importance of using drink coasters.

I was out of place and felt it.

Despite our shared British ancestry, the family and I were as different as night and day.

It didn’t help that in this small corner of England the class system was still firmly entrenched and my egalitarian (and often outspoken) approach to life constantly got me into trouble.

As my mistress once shrieked at me, I made a very good cook, but a pitiful servant.

Despite managing to view this as a compliment, I found it a challenge to stay positive.

Bonding with Onions

Since I was fattening up the family on omelettes and kippers for breakfast, scones and jam for afternoon tea and a three course meal of pate or soup, beef or pheasant, cobbler or apple tart for dinner, I was required to keep it simple for lunch.

This meant a platter of tomatoes, onions and basil every lunch time for six weeks. A simple, pleasant meal to prepare… except that I am allergic to tomatoes.

Boning pheasant, stuffing a goose or gutting a sea bass have nothing on handling tomatoes for me.

And these were hothouse tomatoes, grown in the garden, so fat and sodden with summer sun that when I went to collect them, they exploded under my feet like land mines.

Disgusting….

So I became very heavy-handed with the onion - and to this day it remains my favourite vegetable!

Lamb Pie, Leek Tart and Life’s Lessons

They say that to dream of an onion means that a situation in your real life is multi-layered, and you need to look beyond the obvious, peeling away the skin to get to the heart of the issue.

I certainly “grew” in that long, lonely summer.

Just as my culinary skills were challenged every day in the kitchen (learning to bone a rabbit was one lowlight) I also discovered that I can:

• work hard, even without positive reinforcement
• meet deadlines, even if they are unrealistic
• rise to the challenge, even if I am unsupported
• maintain my dignity, even if I am put down
• enjoy life, even if I am alone

What I ultimately learned about myself was that in difficult circumstances I prefer to look for the positive angle, rather than giving in to onion tears.

Keeping Your Cup Half Full

There are times when a great many layers need to be peeled back to find the “silver lining”, but there are four simple guidelines that help me stay positive:

1. I keep focused on what makes me happy
2. I stay the course, never allowing negative events, people or challenges to deter me
3. I seek counsel and comfort from people I trust
4. I anticipate life’s struggles and deal with them when they arrive

I believe in these principles so strongly that when I decided to create a story about a woman struggling to stay positive, I used these four simple points as the signposts on her journey.

The message at the heart of the eBook “Keep Your Cup Half Full” is that positive thinking is a skill that you can develop.

Just like a dirty pot, with a bit of elbow grease you can scrape away the grime and uncover the silver lining!

If you would like a free copy of the Outfit Inspirations eBook “Keep Your Cup Half Full”, just subscribe to this site before the end of September!

On Aaron Potts’ Blog Today is that Day, in his “7 Ways to Become a Positive Person” post, he talks about consciously experiencing and appreciating uplifting things every day.

As a proactive technique he encourages the use of visual affirmations and advises us to “put uplifting messages on your computer wallpaper or around your office, set up your email program to send you affirmations at certain times each day, use your cell phone or PDA to send yourself positive messages and reminders at preselected intervals.”

This is a technique that really works. After all, we are visual beasts – just look at all the members in great communities like MyBlogLog – and actively seek out inspiring images and messages. Positive thoughts and good intentions swimming around in our subconscious can crystallise with the right kind of visual prompts and inspire us to action.

I was introduced to visual affirmations at a women’s retreat in the South West forest – think lots of women (who have never met before!) singing, dancing, bearing souls, swimming in freezing oceans and burning letters on the beach – and you can imagine the state of the lodge once we had taken to our vision boards with glue, scissors, textas and more magazines that a doctor’s surgery. I still have that vision board (no I won’t put a photo of it up!) and it has given shape to my goals in a way a list on my fridge could never do!

If this all sounds a bit fluffy and intangible, ask yourself if you have ever done the following:

• Looked at a photo of home when you were overseas? (I had a brilliant picture of my local pub that I carried all over Europe – next to the one of my family of course.)
• Watched the ocean when you were feeling upset? (It’s the permanent view from my window, luckily!)
• Stuck a picture of a gorgeous girl on the fridge door to keep you away from the chocolate bickies? (No mention of where guys would stick it…)
• Bought an artist’s impression of a place you have visited? (My favourite is a charcoal drawing of Prague.)
• Copied an inspiration quote onto a notebook? (Check out the great quotes on women at our site.)

A friend at one of the businesses I pass through took a less than enjoyable contract and on her first day she stuck a photo of her new motorbike on her cubicle. As each difficult week passed she drew a line down the photo. Week one she had paid for half of the back tire, week two she was half way along the fuel tank and so on…

At Outfit we have developed a range of affirmation posters. There have positive affirmations already written for you, but if you prefer developing your own, have a look at the free cards. All the aids are designed to help you to:

• Stay Positive
• Believe in Yourself
• Embrace Change
• Realise Your Opportunities
• Boost Your Self-Esteem
• Get Your Priorities Right

If you like these visual aids, have a look for our Tip Kits on our “Inspiring Free Tools” page.

Enjoy!